What better way to celebrate a day that emphasizes family togetherness, good graces, and wholesome traditional values than with a cultish 8-ball able to predict the very future we will live? Welcome to a very special edition of the Magic 8-Ball!

Q. Magic 8-Ball, will Colt McCoy be healthy enough to come back for NEXT week's game?

A. It is certain

Q. Will Brian Daboll be our offensive coordinator next year?

A. It is decidely so.

Q. Will Jake Delhome do well against the Panthers this week?

A. My sources say no.

Q. Will the Browns be able to go 5-1 to finish the season?

A. Without a doubt

Q. Will the Browns beat the Panthers?

A. Very doubful.

Q. Does it suck rooting for Buffalo right now?

A. Without a doubt.

Happy Turkey Genocide Day everybody!