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Project Detritus or Mooncamping´s Oracular Spectacular applied to the Draft

Project Detritus or Mooncamping´s Oracular Spectacular applied to the Draft

Buster Skrine, Browns In House Products;  One of the positive surprises, this season.
Buster Skrine, Browns In House Products; One of the positive surprises, this season.
Jim McIsaac


Project Detritus or Mooncamping´s Oracular Spectacular applied to the Draft

You might be aware, that Pokorny likes to pit our Offensive and Defensive units against our opponents prior to each game.

I got to thinking about the sadness, that envelopes the fans at the end of a season.  Especially in a losing year.

Players start fearing for their jobs.  Management has to grit their teeth, in reevaluating the quality of players, and start loosening the purse strings to acquire new prospects, that hopefully signal an improvement over what we now have.  And have become accustomed to.

There is only a slight recognizance and recollection, that the NFL is an elitarian institution to bring top level football competition to us.  And not even a small market team, as cozy as Cleveland, can escape the principles set forth, to keep competitive structures going, at every level.

The fans like to look to authoritative sources to brace for the impact of pending Offseason moves, that exemplify our ambitions and support our aspirations.  The price?  Realism.  Fair comparisons.  Promises.

So, since I got to thinking about the melancholy of a season ending and the imposition of further changes.  And following Pokorny´s lead.  I´ve devised a scheme, that could make it easier to contemplate the sensibility of firing and hiring new players to represent our club´s desire to compete for championships, or at least be a franchise with a reputation, as a collection of athletes, that is respected as a good opponent.

It goes as such.  And the extra benefit is, that it might serve to enlighten the Steelers too.  About their strength of roster:  I will pair Offensive and Defensive players, as they will face each other, according to Depth Charts.  And declare the victor.  And follow that up with a suggestion, of whether each competitor should retain their hold on that Starting Position.

It´s not fun.  But, I think we can dig the format as judges of superior football skills and talent.  Lets just hope, that life has prepared interesting alternate career paths, for the commendable "it´s better to have tried and failed, than not to have tried at all" constituents.  And that the culture in general is advanced enough to honor these attempts as worthy of compliment, in the interest of the proliferation of our favourite sport.

Lets go.  Since we´re the Visiting Team, our Offense goes first:

Joe Thomas versus Brett Keisel.  Winner Brett Keisel.

John Greco versus Lawrence Timmons.  Winner Lawrence Timmons.

Alex Mack versus Steve McLendon.  Winner Steve McLendon.

Shawn Lauvao versus Vince Williams.  Winner Shawn Lauvao.

Mitchell Schwartz versus Cameron Heyward.  Winner Cameron Heyward.

Jordan Cameron versus Jason Worilds.  Winner Jordan Cameron.

Josh Gordon versus Ike Taylor.  Winner Josh Gordon.

Greg Little versus William Gay.  Winner Greg Little.

Greg Ogbonnaya versus Chris Carter.  Winner Chris Carter.

Willis McGahee versus Troy Polamalu.  Winner Troy Polamalu.

Jason Campbell versus Ryan Clark.  Winner Ryan Clark.

Then their Offense:

Kelvin Beachum versus John Hughes.  Winner Kelvin Beachum.

Ramon Foster versus Craig Robertson.  Winner Ramon Foster.

Cody Wallace versus Phil Taylor.  Winner Phil Taylor.

David DeCastro versus D´Quell Jackson.  Winner David DeCastro.

Marcus Gilbert versus Ahtyba Rubin.  Winner Ahtyba Rubin.

Heath Miller versus Paul Kruger.  Winner Heath Miller.

Antonio Brown versus Joe Haden.  Winner Joe Haden.

Emmanuel Sanders versus Buster Skrine.  Winner Buster Skrine.

Will Johnson versus Jabaal Sheard.  Winner Jabaal Sheard.

LeVeon Bell versus T.J. Ward.  Winner T.J. Ward.

Ben Roethlisberger versus Tashaun Gipson.  Winner Ben Roethlisberger.

Now.  The Winner is not an automatic keeper.  And the Loser is not an automatic release.  It just helps us judge the quality of each player.

Non the less, Mooncamping´s Oracular Spectacular will extend to make a prediction of what Positions will be vacated or replaced.  Per team.

Lets start with the adversary in this case.

Steelers retain:  ILB Lawrence Timmons, NG Steve McLendon, OLB Jason Worilds, OLB Chris Carter, LOT Kelvin Beachum, C Cody Wallace, ROG David DeCastro, ROT Marcus Gilbert, WR Antonio Brown, WR Emmanuel Sanders, RB LeVeon Bell;

Steelers replace:  DE Brett Keisel, ILB Vince Williams, DE Cameron Heyward, CB Ike Taylor, CB William Gay, SS Troy Polamalu, FS Ryan Clark, LOG Ramon Foster, TE Heath Miller, FB Will Johnson, QB Ben Roethlisberger;

Since it´s the devious Steelers, lets add another category.  Players in hiding, retain:  WR Marcus Wheaton, DE Ziggy Hood, NG Loni Fangupo, ILB Stevenson Sylvester, SS Shamarko Thomas;

How about dem Browns?

Browns retain:  NG Phil Taylor, DE Ahtyba Rubin, CB Joe Haden, CB Buster Skrine, OLB Jabaal Sheard, FS Tashaun Gipson, ROG Shawn Lauvao;

Browns replace:  DT John Hughes, ILB Craig Robertson, ILB D´Quell Jackson, OLB Paul Kruger, SS T.J. Ward, LOT Joe Thomas, LOG John Greco, C Alex Mack, ROT Mitchell Schwartz, TE Jordan Cameron, WR Josh Gordon, WR Greg Little, FB Chris Ogbonnaya, RB Willis McGahee, QB Jason Campbell;

Just to be safe.  What do the Browns do, when they´re dishonest?  They try to dump players, that didn´t quite pan out.  Noooo!…I agree.  We have a new management, and they also know the quality of our Backups.  Thus, rather than economize high overhead players away, lets also go to retain:  ROT Garrett Gilkey, TE Gary Barnidge, RB Fozzy Whittaker, DE Armonty Bryant, NG Ishamily Kitchen, DE Billy Winn, ILB Tank Carder, DE/OLB Barkevious Mingo, CB Leon McFadden, OT Chris Faulk;

So, look for the Omens.  Amen!

The Steelers will draft:  DE, CB, CB, FS, LOG, TE, FB, QB;  But, since it´s the Steelers, they always draft LB, but make it look like they don´t need anything else.  Thus, I prophesize that they will draft:  LB, LB, LB, FB, CB, CB, QB.

The Browns as per logic would draft:  DT, ILB, OLB, SS, LOT, LOG, C, ROT, TE, WR, WR, FB, RB, QB;  But, normally they create subterfuge, in the form of lying to their fans, they will keep guys, who´s athletic reputation has not yet been ruined.  Thus I predict, they will draft:  C, QB, FB, SS;