I admit, Donald Trump is Kinda Awesome

I mean.

You have an obvious beef with the NFL, from way back. Like jilted lover shit. You think you're a top athlete, when you're not. You think you can play pretend like the other NFL $ guys, when you can't. And your daddy doesn't love you. Sorry, not The Donald's fault there, the man was a hollowed out shell of a badly gilded slumlord, totally incapable of anything that could actually matter in a human sense. It'd be a tragedy, if it wasn't far too late and too early to talk about The Donald as a victim. Though that time will probably come.

So lots of stuff happens, but ultimately you sue the NFL to try and get your own status, and lose. Actually, you technically "win," because they really are crooks, but win nothing, because you're a worse crook, and then they laughed at you because everyone knows it's really a knife-twisting loss.

And lots more stuff happens and after years of chumming the water you end up in this incredible place with this guaranteed avenue for revenge. A bully pulpit from whence you can get together folks that love Jesus, folks that vaguely disapprove of "the blacks" and how "they" handle their business, and folks that love 'Murika (we're up to like 56.8% now.) You can get them together to wreck your revenge and help create NFL Plus More Boobs and Salutes.

And it's just dropped on your plate- "the blacks" are getting uppity about being shot and whatnot and acting like maybe they don't love 'murika as unconditionally as is officially required of them, and the billionaires that make the money off them aren't able to pretend they care quite enough about these gutter folks that butter their bread to actually defend them instead of defrauding them, and no one (least of all you) remembers word one of what eternally loved Jesus was talking about, and so it's JUST RIGHT THERE FOR YOU TO PICK UP. And it's working GREAT.

And all you have to do, like ALL YOU HAVE TO DO, is know the words to the patriotic pablum bullcrap which your daddy (who didn't love you) taught you to laugh at. That's all that you need to do to run this scam through. And you already kinda know these lyrics, everyone does. But now that you're at the head of this idiot parade, spend 5 minutes and you'll be solid.

And. You. Don't. Bother.

Because why would you? You're "The Donald." When they need to flow they will flow, for as always, you are "The Donald."

And good on him, because you know what? It won't matter. Because actually it turns out you didn't forget the words, you were just overcome by the emotion of seeing all those "Eagles fans" that put country above blackies. America first. You were temporarily blinded by the brilliance of that shining city on the hill.. Or whatever. Doesn't matter. Because who's kidding who? No one ever believed it in the first place, so it doesn't matter how unbelievable you make it. It's just naked realities. Almost none of them believe in Jesus. The majority that vote vaguely disapprove of "the blacks" and don't plan on ever changing. And pretending to love 'Murika is the last thing they're clinging to, and they don't know the words either.

It. Doesn't. Matter.

That's why a fraudulent reality show kinda-star is (pretend) in charge of as much power as any human being in history.

So it doesn't matter that it's an obvious scam. It's almost a feature rather than a bug!

Where was I. Oh yeah! Let's have a new politics thread!

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